- Thanksgiving 2009
- November 26th, 2009
I never thought that in anytime of my life I'd be spending Thanksgiving alone. It kinda sucks, but at the same time it's something that I've never encountered in my whole 27 years. I am still very thankful that I have made it in this situation I'm in for being alive and fortunate. It's really been a while since I've poured my thought on a bland canvas, and looking at my self from the outside. Is this really me? The one writing or the one reading what I'm writing. I am still on my quest for being the best being I could be inside and outside. I have been falling off lately though and haven't been expressing myself in any way. Yesterday I started working out for the first time in weeks and it feels good. Once again I'm going to be where I was at a month ago. The thing that I noticed about myself is that I have no thoughts to myself anymore. My perception of life feels shady and unclear. Where have I gone... my mind lost in it's own thought.
Learning is the key. I wonder how Cris and Fely are... How my pops n Casey.... Just take a deep breath and inhale everything in... God, Love, Family, Life... Become a part of the web... weaving in together. Im just sitting here thinking about me and life and where I fit in.. Can I every write a lyric... Can I ever become interesting... Can I live a life that I will be proud of in the future.. Will I every write a lyric, Will I every become Interesting, Will I live a life that I will be proud of in the future?? I am writing a lyric, I am becoming interesting, I am proud of the life I am living. Breathe... Just Breathe... I have a song inside and it has to come out or else it gets lost... everything that I think about. What happ[ends to the thougts that get stuck inside what happens to actions that are never acted out and what happens to every genius thought in your head that is afraid to come out and take a chance. Sometimes I find myself overcalculating and afraid to take any action because I assume things are just going to happen.
This is my Thanksgiving so far. Things are starting to feel alittle sad inside but it is what it is... Just gotta be strong and I will see the people I love once again.